Ameteur Hour

Here I go, down the aisle, to stand in front of the most handsome boy I’ve ever laid eyes on. He’s 6 feet tall, dirty blonde hair and blue eyes. I am marrying my prince farming. How did I get so lucky?

That was 3 months ago. Now I am sitting in a brand new, heated cattle barn office listening to a heifer struggle to deliver her very first calf. It is 10 degrees outside and 6:30 pm. Around 5 pm this evening, we had plans to go eat and enjoy a night out together as one of those newly married couples. (We are still in that cute honeymoon phase where we can’t get enough of each other…precious right?) Hold that thought…at 5:30 pm, my husband realized that one of his heifers was about to conceive what is promised to be a calf prodigy of the herd according to genetic history and the farmers almanac …you know the really hairy, sound and deep bodied types. Do I sound like I know what I am talking about?…..

Going into this marriage I knew there would be late night tractor rides, early mornings taking care of livestock and a cornucopias amount of dirty laundry. I was so excited to be the support system, the cheerleader and the comedic relief after a long day.  I thought I was prepared for what was ahead in my text book farmer’s wife life. I even had cute new coveralls to dress the part on these cold nights in the barn.

What I wasn’t prepared for, was the late nights of him in the tractor while I am sitting at the kitchen table by myself, with a new pork chop recipe I couldn’t wait to show him. Or the early Sunday mornings when we are supposed to take the Christmas lights down together, but he gets called away to feed.

{So … there I go… up the ladder…not scared of heights ….not me…not at all. Crap… this is high… look down… I have only climbed two steps.}

Or the days when there is not enough Shout stain remover in the world to get this stupid oil stain out of his jeans…

WHY DIDN’T YOU THINK TO PUT A GARBAGE BAG AROUND YOUR ENTIRE BODY BEFORE THE HOSE BLEW ON THAT SKID LOADER!!??

As I sit here, pondering these preconceived notions, trying to live up to the standards of a farmer’s wife, I realize there is so much more to this role than I could have imagined. The stakes are high, the risk is huge and the reward is unthinkable. Yes, I still get to be the cheerleader when he comes into this office after delivering a new heifer calf. I will always try to be the sunshine at home when the rain won’t quit in the fields and of course, my awful jokes will always make him smile. But I have so much more to learn.

So, for all the other new farmer’s wives out there who thought they had the storybook farm life figured out and you are feeling a little discouraged, keep scrubbing, keep cooking, and keep up the good humor. Because he notices and you are so important in his storybook. He may not say it today or tomorrow or even next week. But he’s thinking it! And on the next rainy day, I promise you’ll hear it from him. (If you don’t… maybe wait until it’s not pouring down rain and making a mess of his cattle lot).

Here I am now, 8 pm… Mom and baby are doing swell, Husband has cracked a cold one and I am sitting here in a heated barn office in pink coveralls…Crap Ashlee..you look ridiculous….What is this amateur hour?